There is nothing harder than missing some one and letting it affect your day to day. I find myself in this problem all the time! I have told myself to not let it bother me or not let my day be affected because of the little stuff, like wanting to talk to them or see them so bad its hard to even function until you do. Or counting the hours since the last conversation. It is way easier said then done, I don't even know if I am in a position yet to provide insight on this because I still am finding myself feeling like crap on random days, like seeing a facebook comment on a girls page where the word cute has been used in context to her from my boyfriend... its like a car accident, I can't help but stare and wonder how it happened..... that makes person feel like shit and a about an ounce big, because its not that you don't trust them you just want to know what there day is like, the people they are meeting, how that type of conversation started, or that I see pictures of him having an amazing time with out by his side, that one is a double sword, you are so happy he is happy but it sucks too. Or when there has been a patterned that you have been in of talking at certain time or knowing the schedule they are in and then it gets changed and you don't know what they are doing or when you get to have the chance to talk to them in real time. There is also the awful feeling of how much it kills you inside that you haven't been able to talk to them and you wonder what they they are feeling and how they can go this long without talking to you because you know it is EATING at you to not be able to talk to them. Being over-ally emotion you can go to the extreme especially if you having a hard time you could think the worse, luckily for me I have had no reason to think the worst except for a few comments here and there and my past history. But for those of you who are thinking the worse, the way to make yourself feel better, go back through re-read text messages and emails, the warm feeling comes back I PROMISE, re-reading the old emails helps with the moment of time inability to talk... Trust me I feel like I have been doing that for the past few days... just make sure they are the good loving emails :D.... I promise to add to this idea of tricks to make you feel better as I learn them because I am still learning how to make myself feel better when I hit the brick wall, so far its sit, pray, think really hard, send brain waves to try and get them to realize you want to talk to them(which they should already assume you want to talk to them 24/7), Read old email/text messages, look at 123greetings.com and send them cards, write in blogs, but DON'T over send emails, they will feel so overwhelmed and you will not feel like each email you gave attention too is being reciprocated in the emotional context the way it would have been if they were sent singularly. GOOD LUCK!
Well with the holidays among us, those of you in long distance relationships are going to have a hard time... it is a given... most holidays are very couple-ly. There are few things to make your loved ones not feel empty and forgotten during times that may be harder parts of being in a long distance relationship. Tips to hopefully make it easier....
For the Guys:
You may not see the significance in material things, but when it comes to not having you around the material things fill the voids. There are plenty of things you can buy with out breaking the bank.... 1800flowers is one of them... don't go for the floral bouquet.... go for the potted plants, they will last longer just like don't go for food go for stuffed animals... the point is a double win, you are showing love and its something that will not only last a week. 1800flowers for an example has TONS of options and its easy to find coupons...and with using a web based place you don't have to worry about high international or domestic charges on shipping.
For the girls:
Guys aren't typically into the physical reminder they are more into the private thoughts and maybe the cute things that don't de-masculine him, sending cute cards, weather they be e-cards or real cards(factor in postage, and find out whats easier). or a special phone call that makes the day better.
For the guys:
It is VERY important that you make harder efforts of contact at the random times that will help your loved one cope with the fact that she is having to be alone during holiday seasons... there is no doubt that either way it is going to be hard for her and since you love her you should have no problem trying to help her get through the romantic couple-y season with out you...
For the girls:
Don't over-react, I know there will be times that you ask yourself "is it worth it" then you have to weight the options of "is this current emptiness that you are feeling at this moment worse then the feeling of emptiness if you didn't have your love in your life?" Remember this current emptiness can almost be erased just by hearing from your love even when its not easy to look past it all.
Just remember you are worth the world and your loved one should help you feel that way, if they don't let them know, because if the love is strong, they will do anything in their power to make you feel like you deserve the world.
Well, we both think you are doing the best you can do to be the best communicators, but trust me we all can do something better and different...but you wouldn't know unless you experiment. All smooth sailing till you think to much...atleast that is my problem. I swear things, couldn't be going more amazing! Except I am a over thinker and I think the littlest of clues are extreme...I am aware of this...but we can use this to your benefit...whether you are like me or more normal in thought, I have come up with some phrases that suck to hear when you are long distance and some alternatives to help with a "communication stalemate"
I can't I am busy....let me just tell you, this sucks to hear..because you are long distance and have the slightest clue of what your day may consist of...I understand that the phrase may be a lit easier to say...but sweetie, you are in a long distance relationship nothing is going to be easy...it will all be worth it...SO instead of that phrase say something like, that sounds great, I really wish i could but I have.................... (explain your life, it makes it so much easier) Then the person won't feel shut out, they will understand and feel apart of your day.
Although intentions are good, don't bombard them with a lot of "emails, texts or written communication" They will say that they like it all, but you will tell if it is too much based on how they respond.... If they start responding short stories that feel emotionless, try your hardest to take it back a notch or two...they will feel the difference....
Emotionless writing, it will happen now and then... your job is to write like you would want to read. Would you really want to read emails that are only answering the questions with out explaining their life? no, it would make you feel crappy... So try and make your emails like a conversation, more is better. Imagine that email to be the only email for the whole day, what would you want to say? What would you want the person to feel. Write your emails, read them, and evaluate how you think that would make the other person feel...do that for awhile and you will be come much better at it all in all.....
Hello love bird!
I hope this blog will help you to let your love blossom despite miles between your hands. I will not pretend I am educated in this other than my own personal thoughts and lessons. I hope you take everything I say and apply it in your own way to your situation. Just like every love is different every LDR(Long distance relationship) is going to be different. My advice is going to be from the long distant relationship I am currently in, but I will promise to give other ideas and perspectives because that is the only way to learn all scenarios to best apply to you. I will do research and look up success stories and horror stories. LDR is not for the faint at heart but with the right love and motivation it can be successfully done.
Cheers & Happy loving